Friday, 29 April 2011

Equals - a play in 3 acts

I can’t resist a mini-blog on such a day.

Scene 1. Interior. House on a council estate. Mother and Boy are having breakfast.
Boy: All that work paid off, Mum. I got five A grades.
Mum: I know, son. I’m proud of you.
Boy: Think I’ll go to St Andrews.
Mum: Sorry, son. It’s 9 grand a year there.
Boy: Oh. OK. Never mind, I’ll get a job instead.
Mum: There aren’t any.
Boy: Oh, OK. Any more coffee?

Scene 2. Interior. Palace or castle or some other big, posh place. Phone rings. Boy answers it.
Boy: Hello.
Mum (on phone, sounding happy): Good morning.
Boy: Hi Mum.
Mum: I’ve made you Duke of Cambridge.
Boy; Really? Thanks, Mum.

Scene 3. Some time later.
Sun explodes.


  1. Thanks Neil. Sorry, but it's a true story.

  2. Still, if I had to choose I'd rather be the boy from scene 1. Boy 2 will never be able to buy freedom.
    Strange institution. It shows why we need fiction. The real world is too weird.

  3. But, Anneke, how much 'freedom' will Boy 1 ever have access to?

  4. To start with, the freedom to walk around without being followed by paparazzi, the freedom to scratch your private parts without being photographed. I think both boys have limited options. I'd rather be poor in private than being rich with everybody following every step I take.

  5. @Bill: Hahaha. Great, if depressingly real.

    @Anneke: I'd rather be rich, but not the royal, and scratch my private bits on some nice beach somewhere...result, eh. a bit of balance is nice.

  6. I didn't know women scratched their private bits. I thought that was just men. Ah well, the w*****g has at least increased my knowledge of life.

  7. @Bill: I thought it was a figure of speech? :)

  8. Sara, you're so perceptive.

    Scary, not any more.

  9. I guess the U.S. version would be: "Son, I've just made you chairman of the board." I wondered, as we drove the last few miles of our vacation (holiday)yesterday, how citizens of the UK feel about their royalty, pageantry and all those titles.

  10. Easy to answer, Jean. For some inexplicable reason, the majority want to keep paying for them to 'rule over us'. Needless to say, I'm not one of them.

  11. Equals? What hope for progress, if you don't even THINK you are born equal?
    MUTUAL Respect? Nope, don't see any.
    Holier than thou? Yep,couldn't be clearer.
    Give me,freedom, friendship and equality, anyday.

  12. Succinct, Helen, and spot on.